Little Pink Starfish

Long before Lou ever became one of Nyne’s attendants, Nyne used to visit the Lotus Hall often. Surrounded by young and beautiful Reshas, their voices sweet as birds, their presence lifted his spirits. He often wondered why Lord Amon never once set foot in that place.

The Reshas served Nyne with their full devotion and affection. Some tried to win his favor to get closer to Amon—but Nyne didn’t care about such things. Compared to the solemn, rigid priests, it was only natural that he felt more warmth toward the kind and faithful Reshas.

Of course, among the many, there was one Nyne particularly cherished. Not out of desire, but affection. That Resha had a talent for words, was kind-hearted, and always brought laughter.

Then, one day, more than a year later, Nyne visited the Lotus Hall again—but didn’t see that familiar face. He asked the priests, puzzled:

“Where is Resha…?”

Nyne couldn’t recall the name or face clearly. He had assumed it was due to emotional shock—but thinking back now, it was likely because of Osen Iyad’s ritual. Still, the priests’ answer from that day remained vivid in his memory:

“Rejoice, Sha. Resha… has departed this morning for a joyful afterlife—to be reborn as a true servant.”

“Departed for the afterlife? What do you mean?”

“This is all thanks to the abundant grace you, Sha, have bestowed upon them.”

“Bestowed abundant grace…?”

Seeing that Nyne didn’t understand, the priests led him to the lake—a place used for purification rituals before entering the Lotus Hall. White linen cloths fluttered from the pillars of the lake’s temple. Inside, at the center, lay the Resha Nyne had once cared for, resting neatly upon a narrow bed. They held a fully bloomed lotus in their hands.

Nyne approached and called out to them, but there was no reply. Only then did he realize the bed was made of ice, and the Resha’s color came from cosmetic paint. That was the true meaning of “departing for the afterlife.”

More than anything else, the truth hit him hardest: that because they were loved by Nyne, they had been chosen—while still young—as one of the finest offerings.

It was, in hindsight, a blessing that Amon never showed interest in the Lotus Hall. Wherever his gaze or hand touched, it would have bloomed with death.

After that, Nyne stopped going to the Lotus Hall entirely. He only attended when the Reshas held rare feasts—and even then, he kept his distance. He tried not to grow fond of anyone who might vanish after only a few months. He avoided learning their names, their faces.

Because the pain was simply too great.

Even when Reshas looked upon Amon with longing eyes, Nyne felt almost no jealousy. He knew their time was short. Even when he expelled Resha Maz and Idre for stealing from Gwen, he considered it merciful deep down.

And when he told Resha Gwen to leave if he didn’t want to die, he meant it from the bottom of his heart. Entering the Lotus Hall was hard enough—but leaving was worse. One’s possessions were confiscated, they were barred from entering the palace again, and they were officially disowned by family and kin. Most Reshas, rather than suffer that disgrace, chose death.

Nyne once advised a Resha to leave. Days later, they “departed for the afterlife.” Since then, he never said such words again.

But Gwen… Gwen was a foreigner, not bound to Trastasa. Even if exiled, he had somewhere to return. Solana, his homeland—or even that labyrinth he mentioned. Because Gwen had a path to survival, Nyne found it easier to give him his affection freely…

“Lord Nyne. Resha Lou Mairy requests an audience. What shall I do?”

Popo’s voice interrupted Nyne’s memories. He raised his head, pressing his fingers to his brow. Popo bowed under the shadow of Nyne’s dim golden gaze.

Since becoming a Resha, Lou had requested an audience with Nyne several times a day. Tormented by his own emotions, Nyne had refused every time. But after a brief pause, this time he nodded. He couldn’t avoid Lou forever.

Unlike with other Reshas, Nyne couldn’t simply cast away his feelings for Lou. They had known each other too long for that.

Lou, finally allowed into the sanctuary, looked pale. He bore the weight of Nyne’s repeated rejections—there was even a trace of regret in his expression. Behind him, priests carefully carried in gold and jewels, clearly offerings.

“A true servant greets Sha Nyne.”

Lou greeted him with a trembling voice, then signaled to the priests behind. They gently set the treasures down.

“These are offerings prepared for you, my lord. Please accept them.”

They were all clearly chosen by someone who knew Nyne’s tastes intimately. But Nyne didn’t even glance at them. He ordered coolly:

“Call me Sha Nyne.”

Lou hesitated mid-sentence, as if about to say “Lord Nyne” again—but corrected himself.

“Yes… Sha Nyne.”

He looked at Nyne with pleading eyes, desperate for forgiveness.

How can I get Lou out of the Lotus Hall…?

That was all Nyne could think about. He had already issued a command to cancel Lou’s induction as a Resha. But the answer had come back: it was too late. The ritual was complete. Lou had already “offered his body” as a true servant. To leave now, he would have to undergo a grueling ritual of apostasy.

Of course, if Nyne insisted, the harsh rites could be waived. Lou might never be a feather-fanner again, but he could still serve in some capacity.

But Nyne doubted Lou could bear the shame of being treated as an apostate by the other priests. As he frowned, lost in thought, Lou misread his silence and spoke in a sorrowful voice.

“I only wish to serve you with all my heart as your devoted servant, Sha. I swear—I had no other desire. I just… wanted to be cherished by you, like Resha Gwen is.”

“Lou…”

Nyne called his name with a sigh of sorrow—then caught himself. He bit his lip and scolded him.

“You can’t say you had no desire to be closer to Lord Amon. That would be a lie. Isn’t that so?”

Lou’s face turned pale. Tears welled up in his eyes.

The other priests silently observed the former attendant—now rejected by the Sha. Lou couldn’t deny it, nor claim it was only Nyne he wanted to be near. He was too afraid that saying such a thing about Amon might be considered blasphemy.