Little Pink Starfish

Amon was standing still in the garden. Compared to the attending priests, his height made him look like a different species altogether. He was watching rare fish swim along an artificially made stream, then turned his head toward Nyne.

“Sha Amon.”

Nyne greeted him and cautiously observed his expression. Half of him was worried that Amon might ask about the missing feather; the other half wanted to ask about its origin. But he suppressed it. He didn’t want to stir things up—so today, he avoided feather accessories altogether.

This water garden was breathtaking no matter how many times one saw it. From the towering wall, water poured down like a waterfall, creating a soft mist. Priests picked flowers daily and let them drift into the stream, where they floated along geometric paths. At the stream’s end was a lotus pond in full bloom. Priests cleaned the stream each dawn with brooms, so there wasn’t a trace of algae.

Unusually, Amon was wearing a kalarisiris. The veil-like fabric gently covered his perfectly muscular body, and heavy golden jewelry anchored the cloth, keeping it from fluttering too freely.

“You’ve come at a good time. I was about to eat dinner.”

“A meal with you, Lord Amon, is something to look forward to.”

Nyne replied brightly and stood beside Amon. The colorful small fish swimming with the current were truly adorable. As he calmly looked around, Nyne suddenly muttered in confusion.

“…Ah?”

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing. I thought I saw a pink fish just now… I must have been mistaken.”

Feeling a chill down his spine, Nyne quickly corrected himself. Surely not… Just as he turned his gaze away, a nearby priest politely spoke.

“If you mean a pink fish, it does exist, Sha. We brought in a newly bred species a few months ago.”

“Is that so?”

Feeling relieved, Nyne followed the stream with his eyes. Now that he thought about it, there were also rare pink carp in his own garden pond. Sure enough, a pale pink fish soon swam by, flicking its tail. Unlike the ones in his pond, it was tiny and adorable. As he moved to get a closer look, a perceptive priest asked,

“Shall we send that species to Sha Nyne’s sanctum?”

“Do so. I’d like to raise them in a small tank.”

“We will prepare it right away, Sha.”

No matter how strange and shameless that Lesha is, he wouldn’t dare sneak into Amon’s sanctum, Nyne thought, scoffing inwardly. Just then, he heard the cry of an animal and turned around. Priests were leading in a calf, a goat, and a deer.

Amon’s sanctum doesn’t even have a livestock pen. What’s with these animals?
As Nyne watched in confusion, Amon approached and said,

“Nyne, pick one.”

Nyne examined the animals. They all looked clean and well-kept. The calf, in particular, had innocent, blinking eyes and looked adorable. Wanting to pet its head, Nyne made his choice.

“The calf seems precious and clean, Lord Amon.”

“Does it?”

At Amon’s gesture, priests led away the other two animals. Soon after, priests brought in a large table. As they began to lay out food, Nyne’s expression gradually hardened. He finally recalled that something similar had happened before. Frozen in place, he heard Ossen Iyad speak.

“It’s larger than the deer last time, so there should be more tender and high-quality meat.”

Nyne barely kept his emotions in check and sat down without replying. Watching the deer be slaughtered last time had felt like his senses were going numb. The calf, being larger, made his stomach churn even more. If I’d known, I’d have picked the goat instead… but what difference does it make between a goat and a calf?

They’re not human—I should be unaffected. But I’m not.
Nyne felt a deep self-loathing. It seemed like he was the only one in Trastasa troubled by these things. The recent peace without rituals had been nice…

“Nyne.”

Amon spoke to him as he stared blankly at the priests feeding the calf and covering its eyes with a cloth.

“Iyad says, if your stomach is weak, it’s better to get used to this slowly by watching.”

One priest gently stroked the calf, and another raised a knife with a sharp, polished blade. Amon kissed Nyne’s cheek and said,

“From small to large, and then to the more intelligent.”

Nyne wanted to ask, Why must I get used to it? Why must even intelligent beings eventually include people? But his lips wouldn’t open.

Hearing Amon’s words, Nyne looked around. Trastasa’s imposing presence, its worshipers who offered their lives to the Sha, the towering, sprawling buildings built in Amon’s honor—everything was under Amon’s control. Nyne once again felt how utterly he was subordinate to Amon.

“Thank you for your concern, Lord Amon.”

Feeling overwhelmed, Nyne thanked him. Amon and Iyad were right. He would live his whole life here—he couldn’t always recoil and be afraid. With a heavy heart, Nyne watched as the priests slaughtered the calf.

Because such scenes were common, the priests were skilled. Since it was in front of a Sha, they ensured no cries or painful struggles occurred. While Amon and Nyne enjoyed their appetizers, the priests swiftly drained the blood and skinned the calf. Every part had value—blood, innards, and hide were all collected in large basins.

Once finished, the priests washed the blood clean and carved out the most tender meat. Then they took the heavy basins and left. As the main course began—well-grilled beef—priests lovingly wrapped raw slices of tender meat around small magic stones. Hidden inside each bite-sized piece was a marble-sized stone.

Since Nyne didn’t enjoy raw meat, and seeing the stones, he assumed it was Amon’s dish and didn’t even look. Struggling to keep from retching, he slowly chewed the tender grilled beef when Amon suddenly offered him one of the raw meat pieces with a stone inside. Nyne’s eyes widened. With a stone inside?
Flustered, he hesitantly accepted the meat.

The salty-sweet seasoned tartare was juicy between his teeth. Magic stones were incredibly hard and notoriously difficult to process—only priests trained in magic could handle them. Fearing for his teeth, Nyne chewed carefully.

He flinched as something hard touched his teeth—was it the stone? But its soft crumble told him it was just a nut. The combination of seasoned tartare and nut turned out to be quite tasty. No stone shards were felt as he swallowed. Amon’s golden eyes narrowed as he watched.

“It’s rather good, isn’t it?”

“Yes, Lord Amon.”

“You eat well. It’s good to see.”

It seemed the priests had prepared special meat without the stone just for him. As he slowly chewed another piece that Amon offered, Nyne felt relief. At least he didn’t have to worry about breaking a tooth. As he focused on his favorite fish dish, he failed to notice the priests’ widened eyes sneaking glances at him.

After dinner, Amon—usually emotionally neutral—appeared to be in an unusually good mood. As if enjoying dessert, he pulled Nyne into his arms on the bed and nuzzled into his neck. He inhaled deeply, brushing his nose from Nyne’s hairline down to his shoulder blades.

“My most precious.”

The lord of Trastasa spoke in a satisfied voice, raising the corners of his mouth. His large, strong hands gently caressed Nyne’s hair and skin. Held in his arms, Nyne felt a strange emotion. He absentmindedly thought:

I might not be Amon’s consort so much as a pleasing pet. Mind and body, neither truly free… slowly being tamed…

“Don’t be harmed or blemished. Stay beautiful forever.”

Amon whispered, not just softly but sweetly, breaking Nyne’s thoughts. It was affection and praise—words no priest or anyone else would dare hear.

Yet today, his chest ached. Not a sting, but a dull, constricting ache like being bound in rough rope. More than joy or pleasure, anxiety and fear stirred in his heart. Trying to forget it, Nyne clung to Amon and said,

“Lord Amon.”

“Yes.”

“I dare… deeply and dearly love you…”

His voice trembled as he confessed. It sounded more like a plea than a confession—a desperate voice hoping Amon would give him something, just a little.

“Is that so.”

Golden eyes curved gently. As Nyne blankly stared with a trembling chest, the next words came.

“It’s pleasant to hear.”

But the response Nyne wanted never came. Amon’s answer sounded much like what he said when Nyne moaned in shame and pleasure during their intimacy.