Little Pink Starfish

How… Utterly dog’s blood… And yet… What the bloody hell, must you be so utterly mortifying?! At that moment, Gu Bai felt especially tragic beyond words (or comprehension).

As someone who had neither lied in his previous life nor found the need to lie in this one, Gu Bai’s lying skill was approximately -5. Meanwhile, the pervert’s ability in this area was clearly maxed out. But hearing this narrative, dripping with the flair of a bone-chillingly dramatic white lotus, made him shudder from the depths of his soul. So cold…

It took all of Gu Bai’s willpower to suppress the urge to rub his arms and shiver on the spot.
He watched as Qiguan Rui effortlessly spun a web of lies in front of Xin Xinba, from expressions to gestures, story logic to the minutest of details. Everything was Oscar-worthy—pure perfection. Even Xin Xinba, a seemingly brash but actually meticulous powerhouse, fell for it. Bloody hell! This has got to be a golden finger, right? Everyone in this world naturally trusts the protagonist as long as he desires it! Damn it, this is absolutely the legendary protagonist’s halo!

Gu Bai had long known, back when he was writing, that such idiotic halos were inherently ridiculous. But seeing it in action now… Alright, fine. Since he was now on the same side as this pervert, the dumber Xin Xinba got duped, the better! ╮(╯▽╰)╭

And so, Qiguan Rui kept deceiving Xin Xinba, while Gu Bai stood by, playing the high-and-mighty idle partner. His only task was to strike a noble and cool pose. By the time the charade ended, Xin Xinba’s wariness had successfully dropped to its lowest.

Ahem, Xin Xinba now greatly admired this pair of… ahem… Lovebirds. But wouldn’t it be better if the young man was his granddaughter’s little lover? Then again, being her sworn brother wasn’t bad either. It still counted as new blood for the Xin family!

Soon, Xin Xinba was chatting amicably with Qiguan Rui, breaking down barriers. While Gu Bai feigned a trance state, the elder and the youth seemed to have forged a deep cross-generational bond and established the beginnings of a cooperative relationship.

Of course, on the surface, this was still Qiguan Rui’s act of allegiance. In the end, Xin Xinba left satisfied, but Xin E’s existence could not be exposed*. Instead, Gu Bai and Qiguan Rui joined the Xin family as their guests under Xin Xinba’s command. While the two were unfamiliar faces, a direct order from the patriarch granted them far more freedom than Xin E ever had. _{*[T/N: Because the homophobe doesn’t want to undo the exile.]}

***

Qiguan Rui leaned in to brush against Gu Bai’s cheek, speaking in a syrupy tone: “Gege, do you think I did well?”

Gu Bai glanced at him; his expression slightly odd.

Qiguan Rui’s voice softened even further, and his gaze practically dripped honey: “…Gege?”

Gu Bai patted his head. “You did well.”

At that moment, Gu Bai felt that the pervert was becoming stranger by the day. Technically, he was now being… Kept by this pervert, right? But why did it feel more like he was the one raising a perverted pet? ORZ—oh, whatever.

At least his life wasn’t in immediate danger. As the person closest to the pervert, as long as he died just a little earlier than the pervert, he could live longer than anyone else in the world! Clenching his fists, Gu Bai found that more than enough motivation to carry on.

***

Gu Bai and Qiguan Rui moved out of Xin E’s boudoir and into a luxurious guest room in the Mighty Ape King’s mansion. These quarters were far larger than the previous ones and came with over a dozen demon-maiden servants—a truly extravagant arrangement.

During the day, Qiguan Rui spent his time mingling with Xin Xinba. At night, he returned to “mingle” with Gu Bai. Their days were exceptionally full.

Gu Bai also realised that Qiguan Rui sought to gain Xin Xinba’s trust while simultaneously developing his own influence within Demon Island. For all of this, he needed Xin Xinba to open the doors of opportunity.

After about seven or eight days, perhaps due to Xin Xinba’s growing trust, Qiguan Rui suddenly returned with a piece of news: 

They were going to a place that could enhance their abilities.

As they travelled, Gu Bai walked beside Qiguan Rui, expressionless, while overhearing whispers—both veiled and unmasked. Qiguan Rui, on the other hand, smiled and nodded at everyone they passed, seemingly well-liked already.

From the gossip, Gu Bai gathered that Qiguan Rui had portrayed him as an aloof martial arts fanatic who had abandoned everything upon meeting Qiguan Rui. His life now revolved solely around martial training and Qiguan Rui, knowing and caring for nothing else—it oddly aligned with the original draft’s character outline for Ziche Shubai.

While Gu Bai mentally griped about the pervert’s ever-evolving lies, he also found it acceptable. He wasn’t skilled at plotting anyway, and sticking close to the pervert spared him the effort of thinking. Besides, with Qiguan Rui’s intense control freak tendencies, as long as Gu Bai didn’t provoke his suspicion, he could survive longer. Plus… Even if Gu Bai tried to think, he could never guess the pervert’s twisted thought process! The current Qiguan Rui was far creepier than the one he’d written, alright?! It was truly blood-inducing. [T/N: Yeah, really gets the blood.]

After a long trek, they arrived before an artificial hill. The sight of the hill immediately clued Gu Bai into their destination:

The Xin family’s training grounds.

Large families always had several dozen training arenas. Without shadow guards, death warriors, or secret agents, they’d hardly qualify as a proper family!

Of course, most authors of harem novels—Gu Bai included—had no clue what real aristocratic families were like. But that ignorance only fuelled more thorough and fantastical imaginings, complete with the legendary darkness that seemed profound but was really just dramatic. Whether such fantasies could support a family’s survival in reality? Who cared? As long as it was satisfying!

And so, since the Mighty Ape King was one of the Five Elders of Demon Domain, the Xin family under his control naturally boasted numerous training grounds. The most renowned of these was the large, secret training ground concealed beneath an artificial hill.

All Xin family demon scions trained there, engaging in sparring and other family-specific regimens. Xin Xinba allowing Qiguan Rui and Gu Bai to access this facility was as good as acknowledging them as his own people.

Gu Bai was unsurprised. In this book, how many people had escaped being duped by the perverted protagonist?

The artificial hill creaked, spinning aside to reveal a dark entrance and a long, downward staircase. Hill panels, bed boards, bookshelves, grass-covered tunnels, staircases—the standard hidden passageway configurations. Having walked through the secret path to Xin E’s room earlier, Gu Bai remained calm as he traversed this new one leading to the family training grounds. His noble, cold, untouchable aura remained intact!

The passage was lengthy, twisting and turning until one might lose their bearings. Finally, a passage guard led them to a towering iron door. The door opened, revealing a different world.

The sight was straightforward: shirtless men sparring in the sweltering heat. Their sweat fell like raindrops, forming tiny puddles on the ground. On one side, raucous cheers erupted as a circle of men surrounded a brawl. _{[T/N: I EXCITEDLY GIVE A THUMBS UP!]}

Gu Bai’s summary after a glance: Boring. There was nothing exciting about this. Then he turned to Qiguan Rui with a frosty glare. You want me to strip and fight these dudes? Like hell I will!

Qiguan Rui’s gaze was gentle. “There are many skilled fighters here, Gege. You’ve had little experience against demons; this is a valuable opportunity, isn’t it?”

Gu Bai’s expression didn’t change. “…No stripping.”

Qiguan Rui paused, then chuckled softly. “Gege trains in extremely cold Wu Qi. You won’t feel hot, so there’s no need to undress.”

Only then did Gu Bai nod. That’s more like it.

****

Pinky says: Boooooooo! Come on! Take your shirt off! Come on everyone let’s peer pressure him!