Little Pink Starfish

I hate this damn show business.

Industries that sell performances for money eat away at the soul of their members and erase their personalities.

Where the soul once stood, commercialism grows; where character once stood, marketability becomes necessary.

At first, artists focus on the business side.

How much money they’ve made, how much they will make, how much they could make.

But once success becomes routine, business fades and they shift focus to the show itself.

They think about how much they need to show to make people happy.

That’s not inherently bad.

Being able to create something that brings people joy is a tremendous talent.

The problem is that at some point, the artist’s standard stops being their own and becomes yours.

Am I genuinely smiling?

Or am I smiling because you like it?

The moment that confusion sets in, the concept of self dissolves, and one’s mind collapses.

I’ve watched countless singers resort to self-destructive behavior to overcome this.

From the outside, it seems absurd: “They make so much money, why live like that?”

But I understand.

Self-destruction is the easiest way to prove to oneself that they still exist.

But then what about me?

Endlessly wandering through these closed timelines, where do I find proof of my own existence?

Even if I try self-destructive behavior, I can’t feel it.

Hands shaking from alcoholism? One reset fixes that.

Throwing hundreds of thousands of dollars out a hotel window? Meaningless.

At one point, I even developed schizophrenia through repeated regressions.

No, not even schizophrenia. It’s not a disease if you have no objective sense of reality.

But one day, in a concert hall, a thought came to me.

Even if all of this is a schizophrenic delusion, even if it’s some Truman Show farce—

The joy of those cheering cannot possibly be fake.

Even if I disappear, even if this timeline collapses, the joy they once felt while listening to my song won’t vanish.

It was a simple realization, but one I finally accepted after dozens of regressions.

From that moment, my standard became you.

In these closed timelines where no objective standard exists, this was my only realism.

Today, I want that again.

This isn’t a stadium, or a concert hall.

It’s just a music show created purely for show business.

But I still want to feel alive.

I want to make even those who don’t support Sedalbaekil lose themselves and scream.

“Alright. Got it.”

“Let’s do this.”

The members suddenly spoke to me.

Did I say something aloud?

I must have mumbled while lost in thought.

At that moment, the music show staff signaled, and we stepped onto the stage.

Soon after—

State Of Mind’s intro began.

---

The sound of flames crackling was heard, and through it came a long, low whistle.

Sedalbaekil members stood motionless in formation, yet it didn’t feel static.

Then.

[Focus……]

[State of mind!]

With Lee Eon’s voice announcing the intro, a sharp yet gritty melody poured forth.

Riding the melody, as always, Koo Taehwan began.

Confused

Inside of me

Dangerous Things

Han Shion had once advised Koo Taehwan during Coming Up Next to try singing with a two-four rhythm.

Because Taehwan wasn’t fully utilizing his unique sense of rhythm.

But now, whether it’s two-four or one-three rhythm, Taehwan has mastered both.

Ask what makes a good song and you’ll get countless answers.

But ask what makes a hook song, and Han Shion would answer this first:

An intro that grabs you instantly.

A sound that makes you stop and listen when you hear it on the street.

Koo Taehwan had that.

No, Sedalbaekil had that.

Dangerous Trip

Here I am

Staring at you—

Picking up from Taehwan, Choi Jaesung took over.

The choreography suggested a forward step.

But Jaesung cut the beat in half, stepping backward instead.

It created an optical illusion, like moonwalking, but he didn’t keep retreating.

Lee Eon and On Saemiro grabbed his shoulders and pushed him forward.

Sometimes

You stare at me

As if you can’t understand

I know, I know

While the other members refined their strengths, Lee Eon focused on eliminating his weaknesses.

He couldn’t erase the roughness of his tone.

But if Lee Eon could hit the exact pitch, Han Shion could turn that roughness into charm.

This section was exactly that.

In the intricate choreography, Saemiro and Eon’s voices blended so tightly that you couldn’t tell who sang which word.

“Sometimes” was Saemiro.

“You stare at me” — Eon.

“You can’t understand” — back to Saemiro.

“Cannot” and “as if” — Eon again.

Technically, it wasn’t splitting the lyrics.

Melodically, it wasn’t divided by line.

Han Shion had written melodies that Saemiro could carry alone, then deliberately left gaps for Eon to fill.

When Eon hit those exact notes, it added a distorted flavor.

The melody was clean when sung solo by Saemiro.

But when Eon joined, it gained a dirty, almost distorted texture.

Yet no one would dislike this “dirtiness.”

“Wow, damn.”

“What?”

Music shows are cruel.

Fans usually only cheer for their own group, ignoring others.

But the harmony Saemiro and Eon created was irresistible.

Visually dazzling yet aurally mesmerizing.

That imbalance was more captivating than perfect harmony.

Then Han Shion slid forward and began singing.

State Of Mind was distinctly emo hip-hop.

Rarely for Han Shion, who usually loves genre-mixing, this song stuck to one genre throughout.

People often associate emo hip-hop with mumble or cloud rap, but its roots are in hardcore rock.

More precisely, it evolved from post-hardcore rock.

Thus, emo hip-hop features emotional melodies, complex rhythmic shifts, and chaotic song structures.

And Han Shion was the best in the world at this.

With both feet grounded

The sensation begins

Illusion Theme

A distant border

Fantasy and delusion

He came in off-beat, dropped the melody half-steps, then suddenly pulled the melody forward.

Any expert watching would be astonished by his use of breath.

The originally off-beat melody landed on-beat, but shifted from snare timing to hi-hat timing.

Is it on-beat or off-beat? No one could say.

But Han Shion no longer obsesses over technicalities.

As long as it sounds good, that’s enough.

The pulled melody naturally laid back against the beat, projecting a clear melodic line.

The most magical part was…

-Border!

-Delusion!

The fan chants from the audience landing perfectly on beat.

Realism.

Proof of life.

Even those who didn’t come to support Sedalbaekil were slack-jawed.

I want auditory pleasure to reflect in those wide eyes.

At that moment, the choreography exploded.

Splitting beats finely, using large body movements, members crisscrossed left and right, linking hand motions.

The separation and unison created a sense of unity.

State Of Mind was ultimately a story about mental states.

Not just the music video’s storyline.

Han Shion and Sedalbaekil had long lingered in confusion.

After Coming Up Next, they had chosen risk over stability.

Though they succeeded, there was no relief.

Dangers still loomed, critical eyes still watched.

Like Taehwan’s lyrics, it was confusing.

Like Jaesung’s lines, it was a dangerous journey; like Saemiro and Eon’s voices, misunderstood.

Han Shion stood on a border between illusion and delusion.

Even with both feet on the ground, he couldn’t trust where he stood.

But that’s why—

La- La

Focus on me

State of Mind

Focus on the state of mind.

Though it was no longer my mind, but our minds, that was okay.

Because they were united in thought.

Somewhere, there was cheering unfit for a music show.

Though the members couldn’t spare a glance at each other mid-performance, they knew.

They knew what expressions they were all wearing.

Probably—

They were smiling.

---

-Wow damn!

-Are you seeing this?

-I thought the MV was amazing, but no lol. It’s Sedalbaekil that’s amazing.

-Kpop’s future is bright.

-TT’s foresight is incredible. Honestly, I thought it was lame when they wanted Sedalbaekil to go full idol music—but at this level? Wow.

-The album’s only 13,000 won. Should I buy one?

-Welcome, sir!!!!

-Our kids don’t seem interested in making moneyㅠㅠㅠㅠ They give away so much merch, it’s great but I worryㅠㅠㅠㅠ

-Don’t worry lol. With skills like this, they’ll blow up. Seriously impressive.

-I mean, who the hell were those accusing him of using his parents’ money? After that stage? Agencies will be lining up.

-Exactly. After seeing that performance, those accusations seem absolutely absurd.

-When do fancams drop!?

-Huh? They already have the world’s most expensive fancam on their homepage.

-Oh, that oneㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-lololololol

-What? I think I’m becoming a fan. Tell me, I wanna laugh too.

-HipShion, you win. I’ll swallow my pride and buy this album. Gotta support them so they make another.

-Me too lol. But can we get a full post-hardcore album next? I’d pay 50,000 won for an album filled with SOM-style songs.

-Where do I buy the album?

-Just go to the homepage.

-Don’t you need to be in the fanclub to log in?

-Nope. Album reservation page works for guests or temporary accounts.

-When’s the next fanclub recruitment?

---

The issue with Han Shion’s parents had been shocking and massive.

Industry insiders thought Sedalbaekil’s activities might be hindered for a while.

But they were wrong.

[SBN Music Taste ‖ Sedalbaekil Colorful Struggle (Kpop Remix)]

[SBN Music Taste ‖ Sedalbaekil State Of Mind]

The music and the performance were simply too good.