Little Pink Starfish

The Princess Misunderstood as Wanting to Slaughter the Imperial Harem

“Tell me,” Emperor Xianzong asked his daughter, “what exactly is so bad about my imperial palace? Didn’t you grow up here too?”

Aside from the abundance of food, Yu Xiaoxiao really couldn’t think of anything good about her family home. As an instructor, she was good at disciplining others but weak at giving praise. After racking her brain for a while, she started getting anxious herself. If she said the palace’s imperial kitchen was decent, would her dimwitted emperor father faint on the spot?

Seeing his daughter’s conflicted look, Xianzong felt pained too. Her eyes were lively, but her face—who knew what was wrong with it? It just wouldn’t move. It was as if the flesh on her face had died. Neither he nor the empress had this problem, so where did it come from?

“I don’t feel comfortable with Little Seventh staying in the palace,” Yu Xiaoxiao finally gave up trying to appease her father. She shook her head and said firmly. Before entering the palace, she had promised her dear Gu family that she wouldn’t leave Little Seventh here. That was a promise she absolutely wouldn’t break.

“Take Little Seventh to the Vermilion Bird base?” Xianzong said, “What if something happens to him there? Linglong, Ziyi is a child your mother risked her life to bring into the world. You have to think this through.”

Yu Xiaoxiao stared straight at Xianzong.

Afraid she didn’t understand the seriousness, Xianzong added, “Your mother is gone. If you want another full-blooded younger brother, it’s impossible in this lifetime—only in the next.”

Oh, come on.

Yu Xiaoxiao let out a dry chuckle. Did she really have to be father and daughter with this dumb emperor in her next life too? What a tragic and miserable fate that would be.

Xianzong thought about how he’d have to raise this daughter again in his next life and also let out a dry laugh. Maybe it’d be better if he never got married again.

After laughing bitterly, Yu Xiaoxiao told Xianzong, “If I take him out, I’ll be responsible for bringing him back.”

Xianzong shook his head. “Little Seventh is a legitimate prince; he cannot leave the palace for Vermilion Bird.” What if that scoundrel Li Xiaoyuan took him hostage? Who would he cry to then?

“So what are you suggesting?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked.

“How about this,” Xianzong compromised a little. “Tell me who in the palace you think poses a threat to Little Seventh, and I’ll have them removed.”

Yu Xiaoxiao actually thought this idea might work.

“Go ahead,” Xianzong said. “Who don’t you trust?”

Without hesitation, Yu Xiaoxiao said, “I don’t trust any of the women in the harem.”

Xianzong was stunned. “The women in the harem? You mean Concubine Hua and the others?”

“Concubine Hua?” Yu Xiaoxiao repeated.

Xianzong nodded. “Aren’t you just worried about the concubines who’ve given birth to other princes?”

Yu Xiaoxiao raised her brows. “Father, you’re way too naive.”

“How am I naive?”

“Only those who’ve had sons are dangerous?” Yu Xiaoxiao mimicked Granny Wang’s serious tone from that morning. “Those who haven’t had sons, can you guarantee they aren’t plotting a way to secure a heavenly path for their future sons? As long as they’re healthy, what woman can’t bear children?”

Granny Wang had said those words with heartfelt earnestness, but when Yu Xiaoxiao mimicked her, it became a twisted joke.

Looking at his daughter’s contorted expression, Xianzong couldn’t help but suspect she really was planning to wipe out his harem. He jumped from his seat and waved his hands frantically, “That’s out of the question!”

Yu Xiaoxiao also jumped up. She’d been trying to reason with him for half the day, and now he was still insisting on raising that little troublemaker in the palace? “Why not?” she demanded.

“That’s my harem! My—my women!” Xianzong exclaimed.

Yu Xiaoxiao paused, then understood. “Then just let me take Little Seventh away.”

Xianzong shook his head. “That won’t work either.”

“Your women or Little Seventh,” Yu Xiaoxiao slapped the table. “Pick one.”

Abandon his women for the sake of his son? Xianzong pointed a trembling finger at her and yelled, “You’re too ruthless!”

Yu Xiaoxiao tried to put on an angry face to let her dimwitted emperor father know how furious she was.

But Xianzong only saw her twisted face and said, “Sit down,” then softened his voice to coax her, “Linglong, murder comes with consequences. Even princes must face the law like commoners. You’re a princess—same rules apply.”

Murder? Yu Xiaoxiao realized she couldn’t talk life and logic with this emperor. When had she ever said she wanted to kill anyone? So she asked him directly.

“You weren’t planning to kill the concubines in my harem?” Xianzong asked.

Seriously? What a clown!

Yu Xiaoxiao plopped back into her seat. Arguing logic with this clown? That was just dumb on her part.

Xianzong sat down too and pointed at her face. “Just go back to being expressionless.”

Yu Xiaoxiao’s face went stiff again.

Xianzong let out a sigh of relief. That was more pleasing to look at.

Since they couldn’t reach an agreement, Yu Xiaoxiao stayed in a foul mood—and ended up polishing off another plate of pastries.

At that moment, Xianzong thought of a plan. He said, “I’ll send Little Seventh to Wuzhou, to your maternal grandfather’s house.”

“My mother’s father?”

“Yes.”

After the Empress passed away, her two brothers had received an urgent letter from the Gu family. They had rushed from Wuzhou to the capital, fearing the Zhao father-daughter pair would devour their niece and nephew down to the bones. But Yu Xiaoxiao had proven fiercely capable, resolving each danger. After the Gu family sent word of their safety, the two uncles returned to Wuzhou.

Bringing up the Jiang family again made Yu Xiaoxiao suspicious—was her dimwitted father digging a trap for her to fall into?

Xianzong said, “I’ll have the shadow guards escort Little Seventh. No one will know. Don’t worry about your maternal family not taking care of him. Unless the entire Jiang family drops dead, Little Seventh will be just fine.”

Yu Xiaoxiao looked at Xianzong. Was he really saying her grandpa’s entire family was okay?

“So?” Xianzong asked, “What do you think?”

Yu Xiaoxiao said, “The shadow guards aren’t that skilled. What if they run into bandits on the way?”

Xianzong’s eyes bulged. “Not that skilled?” These were elite royal guards!

“Weaklings,” Yu Xiaoxiao shook her head.

Shadow guards…

Compared to Her Highness the Princess, what human wouldn’t be a weakling? Even the Prince Consort was weak, wasn’t he?

“As long as the bandits aren’t stronger than you, they’ll be fine,” Xianzong muttered, rubbing his temples in pain.

“True enough,” Yu Xiaoxiao agreed.

“So it’s settled. Little Seventh goes to Wuzhou. When you return, you pick him up—and visit your maternal grandfather while you’re at it.” Xianzong mentally applauded his own genius. Wuzhou wasn’t anywhere close to the capital. With any luck, his daughter would vanish from his sight for over half a year. He could finally look forward to some peace!