Little Pink Starfish

The Depth and Subtlety of Language

Yu Xiaoxiao thought her Xiao Gu was worrying for nothing. That little troublemaker Yu Ziyi? He was the kind of scourge who could literally survive her death. There was no way that kid would die so easily.

Gu Xinglang held her close and said, “Big Brother isn’t in the capital either. Grand Scholar Ying and the others think… we should bring the Seventh Prince along.”

So her Xiao Gu had not only met with her useless dad tonight, but had even held a meeting with the court’s bigwigs. Yu Xiaoxiao wasn’t too thrilled. “And you? What do you think?”

Gu Xinglang said, “The Seventh Prince can’t be allowed to get into any accidents.”

“So… you also want to take him on the trip?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked.

Gu Xinglang nodded.

Yu Xiaoxiao said, “I’m telling you, Xiao Gu, you all worry too much. That little rascal is tougher than he looks!”

Gu Xinglang asked, “The Seventh Prince is like you? Born strong?”

Crash.
Yu Xiaoxiao was speechless. How was she supposed to explain something like… cross-world genetics to her dear husband?

“I think the Seventh Prince is a normal child,” Gu Xinglang continued. Given how strong his wife was, he had even tested Yu Ziyi’s strength himself. Though the kid was chubbier than others his age, his strength was average. Just a soft little bun.

Yu Xiaoxiao frowned. “Are you saying I’m not normal?”

Realizing he had just stepped on a landmine, Gu Xinglang quickly shook his head. But seeing that his wife wasn’t about to let him off the hook, he lowered his head and kissed her—right on her warm, rosy lips.

Yu Xiaoxiao still had a sugar cube in her mouth. With the kiss, it passed from her mouth to Gu Xinglang’s—and then got snatched right back. After a few back-and-forths, both their mouths were filled with the sweetness of sugar, and the kiss turned increasingly passionate.

When she felt something poking at her from below, Yu Xiaoxiao reached down to touch it.

Gu Xinglang immediately scooped her up and carried her to the bed. They rolled across the blankets in each other’s arms.

Being a completely shameless person, Yu Xiaoxiao was far less reserved than Gu Xinglang at moments like this. Looking at him holding her, she grinned, “Xiao Gu, are you trying to help me meet little Xiao Gu again?”

Little Xiao Gu?

Gu Xinglang’s face flushed instantly, turning red at a speed visible to the naked eye.

Yu Xiaoxiao smiled even more sweetly. If her man was still shy, she didn’t mind being the bold one.

Gu Xinglang took a deep breath, patted her back, and said in a low voice, “Don’t tease me.”

Yu Xiaoxiao bit his lip gently—still sweet, still delicious.

Gu Xinglang hissed and mumbled something under his breath. Yu Xiaoxiao couldn’t quite make out the words, but it sounded suspiciously like swearing.

“Don’t move,” he said, pulling her tighter. But the closer they got, the more torturous it became for him.

Yu Xiaoxiao stopped wriggling and whispered, “Isn’t it bad to hold it in all the time?”

Gu Xinglang replied, “A few days ago, His Majesty had the imperial physician check my pulse.”

Yu Xiaoxiao, still caught up in the thrill of entering a new phase of life, instantly sobered up. She straightened on top of him. “You’re sick?” She’d been sleeping next to him every night and hadn’t even noticed?

“I’m not sick,” Gu Xinglang said. “His Majesty just wanted to know when we’ll be having a child.”

Yu Xiaoxiao’s jaw dropped. Since when did her stupid dad care this much?

“Xiao Xiao, I’m fine,” Gu Xinglang repeated.

Yu Xiaoxiao wriggled her hips again and smiled brightly. “I love kids. Let’s make one, Xiao Gu!”

Gu Xinglang’s face turned even redder—steam practically rising from the top of his head.

She stopped moving. “Wait… don’t tell me you don’t know how? We watched Xiongxiong and Xiao Er’s wedding night through the wall, remember?” After seeing the live version, was her man still too pure to do the deed?

Gu Xinglang twitched at the memory. Eavesdropping on that scene was something he never wanted to remember. Hugging Yu Xiaoxiao tightly, he gritted his teeth and said, “I know.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“I asked the physician,” Gu Xinglang said, practically choking on the words. “He said, if the Princess hasn’t started her… her m-monthly cycle, then we have to wait before… before having kids.” Just recalling the physician’s expression when explaining this made Gu Xinglang want to die.

“Monthly cycle?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked. “What the heck is that?”

Now Gu Xinglang’s head really started to steam. His wife wasn’t the type to play dumb—if she asked, she truly didn’t know. “W-Wang Mama never told you?”

Yu Xiaoxiao started analyzing the term. Monthly means every month, cycle probably means some regular event… So, if it happened monthly, and was related to having kids… “Wait,” she said slowly. “Xiao Gu, do you mean that ‘monthly cycle’ is what we used to call a ‘visit from Aunt Flo’?”

Aunt Flo?
Gu Xinglang was confused. What did an aunt have to do with this? Did his Xiao Xiao even have an aunt?

“You tell me what your ‘monthly cycle’ means first,” Yu Xiaoxiao demanded, genuinely curious.

Red-faced and very much aroused, Gu Xinglang opened and closed his mouth a few times before whispering like a mosquito, “It’s when… when blood flows out from… from a woman’s… uh… lower body every month.”

Ah. The depth and subtlety of language!

Yu Xiaoxiao let out a sigh of admiration. She used to think calling it a “monthly period” was the most cultured version—but now there was a term even fancier: monthly matters.

“You get it now?” Gu Xinglang asked, still red and smoldering.

Yu Xiaoxiao looked at her poor embarrassed husband. If she didn’t nod now, he might just burst into tears. “Yes, yes, I get it,” she quickly said.

“I’ll wait until you grow up a bit more,” he said, flipping them over and sighing in frustration. “It wouldn’t be good for you if I touched you now.”

Yu Xiaoxiao pouted. Life had been too busy lately. She hadn’t even thought about this whole period thing.

“Just let me hold you,” Gu Xinglang said glumly.

Yu Xiaoxiao thought about it and suddenly asked, “Xiao Gu, how do you know I haven’t had my period—I mean, my monthly matters?”