Little Pink Starfish

On the outskirts of the Imperial Capital, there was a luxurious villa district. The villas here sprawled across multiple mountain peaks, with the grandest one situated at the very center—extravagant beyond compare. Only those at the pinnacle of power and wealth could even qualify to compete for ownership, a process that had been ongoing for quite some time.

Finally, the Wu family secured it.

The intricate dealings behind the acquisition were a topic for another time, but within certain circles, it was known that on this very day, the two young masters of the Wu family personally drove their custom-made, discreetly luxurious cars into the villa.

—For a period of time before this, the two Wu brothers had personally overseen the villa’s refurbishment. Then, they suddenly handed it over, reportedly gifting it to someone.

Who exactly?

No one knew.

The security was so tight that not a single outsider caught a glimpse.

That day, the massive iron gates swung open, revealing two rows of fresh-faced maids, each impeccably dressed in European-style uniforms—perfect from attire to appearance. Even the butler, clad in a tailcoat, personally opened the towering iron doors, grandly welcoming the new residents while ceremoniously sending off the Wu brothers.

Later, it was said that an exceedingly handsome master of the house dismissed all the servants before carefully leading an unbelievably beautiful little fairy into the villa—never to emerge again.

↑

The above was all rumors.

In reality, the villa’s owner had indeed moved in, but the details remained a mystery, leaving much to speculation.

·

Gu Bai sat expressionlessly on the sofa—no, the giant, ultra-soft, luxurious couch inside the extravagant villa, still in a daze.

He kept feeling like he was seeing double. Or maybe he was still dreaming…

Because this was way too damn horrifying.

He had never encountered anything this terrifying in his entire life.

He genuinely couldn’t comprehend it…

The damn pervert had actually eaten his body! Eaten it!

EATEN. IT.

His twenty-plus-year-old body had stood there perfectly intact, looking no different from a living person—until his lover casually swallowed it whole before his very eyes!

It was as if he had just watched himself get eaten alive!

The sheer impact of it left him completely stunned.

Gu Bai’s mind was a vast ocean of bewilderment.

I should’ve known. The wheels of fate cannot be altered…

For instance, I thought that dating a pervert would stop the blood sacrifice, but nope—turns out the only way to end it was to sacrifice myself. In the end, that damn pervert went and performed a blood sacrifice to find me anyway!

And another thing—I figured after hundreds of years of being together, I wouldn’t have to worry about my life anymore. Sure, my Ziche Shubai body was safe, but now my otaku body is the one that’s doomed!

Gu Bai had never been so clear-headed.

Yes, the pervert was a pervert—he knew that.

He just forgot that the limits of depravity were constantly being pushed further.

If he was going to date a pervert, he should have anticipated this kind of outcome…

That’s right, I am an open-minded and understanding individual.

I can totally accept this…

I can…

I can accept your ass!

WHOSE LOVER JUST CASUALLY SWALLOWS THEM LIKE “OH, LET’S GET MARRIED”?!

THIS REALLY IS “FOREVER TOGETHER,” HUH?!

This is more real than swearing a hundred oaths!

There’s no way in hell I can stay calm about this!!!

No amount of internal screaming could salvage Gu Bai’s shattered worldview.

After a very long mental breakdown, he finally took a deep breath.

Honestly…

It wasn’t that bad.

Maybe he just needed to look at it from another angle.

_{[T/N: The angle being underneath Qiguan Rui’s bum while he’s dumping out the remains of his former-self.]}

Gu Bai calmly reasoned with himself:

I’ve been in a relationship with this damn pervert for hundreds of years, and in all that time, he’s never eaten a single person in front of me…

In the original novel, the protagonist’s first time eating a person was when he devoured Ziche Shubai.

But in this utterly deranged danmei world, the pervert didn’t eat me. Not even once after reuniting.

Even when absorbing martial energy, he went straight for the dantian instead. And blood sacrifices? That was a different matter altogether. He’s actually quite clean about it. No bad breath or anything…

Wait, that’s not the point. Stay on track.

So, in conclusion—

The pervert has eaten exactly one thing: my otaku body.

My original self.

…Maybe this was kind of romantic?

Yes. Romantic.

Thinking about it that way… it didn’t seem so unacceptable anymore.

Waste not, want not… right?

Heh.

Then, a ridiculously handsome voice jolted him back to reality.

“Madam, dinner is ready. Would you like to eat now?”

Gu Bai—

Madam… what?

His deadpan expression lifted slightly as he looked up—

Standing exactly five steps away was a uniform-clad butler, exuding the very essence of refined seduction.

He looked about twenty-five, incredibly professional.

And after getting a clear look at Gu Bai’s face, the butler’s eyes flickered.

“…Madam?”

Gu Bai: “Change the title.”

His aura of noble indifference kicked in instantly.

The young butler dutifully corrected himself, “Yes, Ma’am.”

Gu Bai: …Ma your grandpa Ma!

Giving the butler a cold, disdainful glance, he rose from the couch and called out, “Gu Xiaoshan.”

Instantly, Qi Guanrui appeared, gently wrapping an arm around Gu Bai’s waist. “Gege missed me?”

Gu Bai eyed him. “Where were you?”

Qi Guanrui tenderly kissed his cheek. “I just finished making dinner… and took care of a small issue with the Wu family.”

Gu Bai pondered. “Not enough gemstones?”

Qi Guanrui chuckled, rubbing against his face affectionately. “No, I’m working with them.”

Gu Bai: “…Oh, I see.”

I don’t even want to know how this so-called “cooperation” works.

Qi Guanrui then carefully led Gu Bai to the dining table, seating him in the master’s chair while he himself took the seat beside him—wherever they were, he always gave Gu Bai the highest status.

Gu Bai glanced at the butler and lifted a single finger.

Then, he poked the thick, ironwood aristocratic dining table—

A perfectly round hole instantly appeared where his finger touched.

Gu Bai, expressionless: “What did you call me?”

The young butler =口= for exactly one second, then smoothly adjusted his tone with a warm smile: “Young Master Gu.”

Gu Bai nodded in satisfaction.

Under the butler’s stunned gaze, Qi Guanrui proceeded to personally serve Gu Bai with meticulous care, effortlessly outclassing the elite butler who had undergone extensive training. The butler quickly realized—this devastatingly beautiful Young Master Gu was extremely accustomed to being spoiled and issuing commands.

Next time he served them, he unconsciously lowered his posture even further.

Being in this presence, one couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of “we are mere mortals.”

After dinner, Qi Guanrui enthusiastically led Gu Bai on a tour of the villa. Wu Shaohai’s arrangements and Wu Ershao’s taste were top-notch, meeting every one of Qi Guanrui’s private requirements—utter luxury, perfectly suited to both Qi Guanrui’s desires and Gu Bai’s dignity.

In this secluded paradise, they spent a blissful honeymoon.

A month later, Gu Bai returned to writing online—he would return to Lingwu Continent eventually, but before that, he had to finish his novel.

Professionalism matters!

Meanwhile, the neglected Qi Guanrui finally left the villa.

—Not to chase after women, of course.

He simply started networking with the Wu brothers.

Thus, he became a hardworking, career-driven, modern man.

He deserved thirty-two thumbs up!

The sound of rapid typing filled the room as a stunning young man, completely expressionless, flew across the keyboard at lightning speed. His creative thoughts were in overdrive, reaching the legendary typing speed of twenty thousand characters per hour.

At this rate, his manuscript stockpile was like an endless river, continuously flowing. In just two days, he had already accumulated a solid five hundred thousand words.

He was fast approaching the final chapter.

Just then, a sickeningly sweet voice interrupted him.

“Gege, gege, pick up the phone~”

“That femboy is calling again~”

“Actually, you could just ignore him…”

Gu Bai: “…”

Getting your train of thought interrupted is the worst!

Why, oh why, did I let that damn pervert record my voicemail greetings during our honeymoon?!

Even worse, why didn’t I feel embarrassed back then?!

Has my sense of shame eroded along with the years?!

With great reluctance, Gu Bai picked up the call.

As expected, it was Wei Liang.

“Hello?”

Wei Liang’s voice sounded slightly melancholic. “…I still can’t get used to the fact that you suddenly switched bodies.”

Gu Bai: “Thanks. You’d better get used to it sooner rather than later.”

Wei Liang sighed even deeper. “Can’t you switch back? It looked so easy—shouldn’t it be possible to switch back and forth without much trouble?”

Gu Bai let out a sigh of his own.

Wei Liang grew curious. “What’s wrong?”

Gu Bai’s voice became a little muffled. “…Gone.”

Wei Liang: “?”

Gu Bai turned his face away slightly. “Eaten.”

There was a moment of dead silence.

The atmosphere turned stiff.

After a long pause, Wei Liang hesitantly asked, “…Are we talking about the kind of ‘eaten’ I’m thinking of?”

Gu Bai covered his face. “He said he wanted to be with me forever.”

Wei Liang =口= “Give me a moment to process that.”

Gu Bai stared blankly at the ceiling.

A long while later, Wei Liang finally spoke again, his tone unnaturally calm. “…I wish you both happiness.”

For the first time in their lives, an indescribable feeling settled between the two childhood best friends.

It carried a touch of ancient sorrow, yet also a sense of acceptance.

In other words?

It was complicated as hell.

Finally, Wei Liang remembered the actual reason for his call and found his voice again.

“…Actually, I called to remind you about something.”

Gu Bai listened attentively. “What?”

Wei Liang sighed. “Do you remember that rebellious little brother of yours? The one who’s currently waiting for you at the school gate to celebrate your birthday?”