Little Pink Starfish

Gu Bai stared with dead-fish eyes at the former protagonist and former archenemy as they went back and forth.

To summarise, Archenemy-kun had come here with the following purpose: Mate, I told my wife about how you helped me, and she thinks you’re awesome. She wants to invite you to our wedding. So, mate, are you coming or not?

Qiguan Rui’s response was: Mate, of course, I’m coming! You’re getting married—it’s a big deal! We’re tight, no need to say more! I’ll definitely bring a huge gift!

It was all very lively.

The two of them chatted for quite some time, and in the end, Long Yuanba left behind a wedding invitation. On it was written: A sincere invitation to Qiguan Rui and Ziche Shubai, the virtuous couple, to attend the banquet.

Upon seeing virtuous couple for the second time, Qiguan Rui’s expression became at least two percent more sincere, and he very graciously expressed his gratitude again.

Then, Long Yuanba left, seemingly still unwilling to part.

Gu Bai looked at the invitation and mulled over the timing. The wedding date… was a bit urgent.

The invitation clearly stated: The third of September. But! Today was already the first of September!

Just how eager was this guy to marry Princess Tianxiang and take her home as his wife?! There wasn’t even time to find a decent wedding gift, was there?!

Needless to say, tonight (and probably tomorrow) would be a sleepless night for many. A royal wedding was practically a death sentence for the officials!

Qiguan Rui saw Gu Bai staring blankly at the invitation and leaned in, nibbling on his earlobe. “…Gege.”

Gu Bai let out a neutral “Mm.”

He had long since become numb to such harassment. Completely indifferent!

Qiguan Rui licked him again. “Gege, do you want to marry me?”

Gu Bai habitually started to hum in agreement—wait! Did he mishear?

Qiguan Rui wrapped his arms around Gu Bai’s neck, his voice husky and seductive. “Gege, marry me, okay?”

Gu Bai answered firmly, “No.”

Qiguan Rui immediately looked pitiful.

Gu Bai sighed. “Gu Xiaoshan, acting cute won’t work.”

Qiguan Rui rubbed against him. “I want to marry gege… I love gege, and gege loves me. Why can’t we get married?”

Gu Bai remained expressionless. “Because there’s no bride.”

With that, he ignored Qiguan Rui’s clinginess and continued zoning out. What a joke. Two men getting married? In a world as aggressively heterosexual as this, pulling something like that would probably make every protagonist in existence go jump off a cliff!

Wouldn’t it invite divine retribution? A meteor might just come crashing down!

↑ Okay, even if that didn’t happen, he wasn’t about to embarrass himself like that. It was completely unbefitting of his cold and noble persona! It would cause an uproar! It would lead to all sorts of trouble! Who would want to deal with that?!

So, rejection was inevitable. Besides, this pervert had a heart of steel.

Qiguan Rui, having failed to act cute successfully, silently touched his chest, then clung back onto Gu Bai. This time, he directly carried Gu Bai to bed. If they couldn’t get married, then at least they could consummate first. ╭(╯^╰)╮

The next two days were filled with springtime bliss.

Only during the breaks in the pa pa pa did Gu Bai occasionally struggle to extend a hand… “…Haven’t picked out a wedding gift yet…”

Then came a hoarse voice. “Yuanhao will handle it.”

Chen Yuanhao: …At your service, Master.

***

Two days later, the wedding was about to take place.

Princess Tianxiang, the most outstanding, most beautiful, most elegant, and most aristocratic princess of the current royal family, had chosen a husband who was backed by a powerful family, was handsome, highly capable, and possessed formidable martial strength. With her noble status, this wedding was destined to be an extravagant affair.

All the factions that had participated in the Tianlong Treasure event but failed to find the treasure were also invited, making the celebration even grander. Thus, the venue had to match the scale. The Emperor of the Cangqiong Empire waved his hand and directly sectioned off a part of the city centre for the event!

As a result, several major streets had to close, and businesses were temporarily shut down to make way for the wedding preparations.

With a wedding like this, every unmarried girl was green with envy. Marry a Long Yuanba or nothing! In the next life, I must be reborn as Princess Tianxiang!

In an instant, jealousy and longing filled the imperial capital…

Gu Bai’s gaze subtly flickered. Thinking back to the original story and comparing it to the current situation…

In the original novel, Princess Tianxiang was the protagonist’s primary wife, but her treatment wasn’t much better than the others.

For example, while she did marry the protagonist, the empire hadn’t fully recognised their union at the time, so their wedding was nowhere near as grand as this one… And while she was the main wife, she wasn’t always with the protagonist. Whenever he went adventuring and picking up more women, the concubines with powerful backgrounds would also get official ceremonies…

A stallion protagonist’s harem never really had a hierarchy*—everyone knew that. 

_{*[T/N: Yeah they’re all equally treated like shit, no discrimination here.]}

Even in his version of the story, though he had clearly designated Princess Tianxiang as the main wife, the only reason things remained stable was that she was strong enough to keep the other women in check. Props to her for that.

But now, Princess Tianxiang was about to become someone else’s wife.

The pervert seemed to have lost out a little, huh?

Qiguan Rui noticed Gu Bai’s odd expression and softly asked, “Gege, what are you thinking about? We’re almost there.”

Indeed, at this moment, Gu Bai was dressed in pure white, carried in a soft sedan chair, followed by a line of strong young men. At the front, Chen Yuanhao led the way, with Qiguan Rui accompanying him. The procession was impressive but not too ostentatious.

The murmurs of the passersby reached Gu Bai’s ears. Hearing such timely and considerate concern, it really felt like someone was constantly paying attention to him… Gu Bai sighed. Oh well. If people don’t look out for themselves, the heavens will smite them. The pervert was already thoroughly bent, so he might as well accept him. Consider it a favour to all the women of the world… It wasn’t like the pervert could turn straight again anyway, so everyone wins.

With that thought, he shook his head. “It’s nothing.”

And then, they arrived at the wedding venue.

Since they had invitations, they didn’t have to stand on the streets watching the ceremony. Instead, they could enter the wedding hall directly.

It was a massive palace, supposedly the future residence of the princess and her husband. At present, it was decked out in red, brimming with festive decorations. Countless banquet tables were arranged, and most of the guests had already arrived. The most distinguished guests sat closer to the front, with the best view of the wedding proceedings.

Gu Bai held the invitation, stepped down from the sedan, and led his group to one of the prominent seats.

The seating arrangement consisted of two rows on either side of a long red silk aisle, leading up to two grand chairs. Many powerful individuals were already seated, with an abundance of high-ranking martial experts from the imperial family.

Gu Bai felt a bit of pressure. So, he subtly flexed… Ah no, he adjusted his fingers and unleashed his most powerful aura. In an instant, the temperature around him dropped ten degrees.

As expected, people took notice. After all, it was rare for a young martial artist to sit among seasoned experts and still exude such an imposing presence. At a glance, he seemed to be on par with the groom himself. But that was all. Just a glance.

Qiguan Rui remained low-key as always. He and Gu Bai, along with their entourage, took their seats and waited for the ceremony to begin.

Other guests finally settled in as well.

Gu Bai maintained his expressionless face while discreetly scanning the room.

Some guests were familiar (from the novel), some were known but unrecognisable (not described in the novel), and some… some he absolutely did not want to see.

What the hell was she doing here?!

The one sitting diagonally across from him, was a stunning, curvaceous, and alluring woman—wasn’t that Liu Manluo?!

Gu Bai felt deeply attacked. He had the urge to grab someone and shake them while yelling, Why?! Why?! Why?! Of course, he didn’t actually do that. Instead, he grabbed the pervert’s hand. The feeling of losing control (not that he ever had control) really required a stabilising force!

Qiguan Rui was gentle. “Gege, what’s wrong?”

Gu Bai gestured with his eyes.

No matter how shocked he was, as a high-and-mighty ice-cold male god, he absolutely could not resort to something as undignified as pointing fingers.

Qiguan Rui glanced over.

Oh? Them?

Yes, them.

Gu Bai had been so fixated on Liu Manluo that he had ignored her company. But she wasn’t alone. Beside her were two tall, burly men, broad-shouldered and thick-waisted—obviously bodyguards. Both were mid-level wu di martial experts.

Qiguan Rui immediately recognised them as moren—demonic beings. Even though they had used potions or some other means to disguise themselves, they were still demons. He wasn’t sure how they had infiltrated the event, but their ability to get in at all suggested strong connections.

After three seconds of blackened contemplation, Qiguan Rui lowered his voice. “Demonic envoys.”

Gu Bai was momentarily shocked before turning his gaze back. Sure enough, upon closer inspection, he spotted the individuals he had initially overlooked. Damn. So those two burly men were the demonic envoys?They sure looked like they could eat a lot.

Liu Manluo had obviously noticed Gu Bai and Qiguan Rui as well. She shot them a flirtatious wink but acted as if she didn’t know them, shifting her gaze away.

She was suffering too, okay? As an absolutely stunning combat-grade mistress (attempted) beauty, she had to attend the extravagant wedding of a woman even more beautiful and powerful than herself and watch the two men she had failed to seduce flaunt their relationship right in front of her.

Truly tragic…

And at that moment, the wedding finally began. As if another arrow had been driven into her heart.