Although Gu Bai always thought he was completely immune to the sugar-coated bullets of this pervert, the truth was that his attitude toward the pervert had softened at a speed visible to the naked eye—for instance, he no longer ordered the pervert around all day long.
Qi Guanrui felt like he had seen the dawn before sunrise.
Gu Bai felt unjustly accused. Knowing that messing with the pervert was just messing himself up, do you think I’m an idiot and want to keep this up? This was obviously a wise decision, okay!
Alright, no matter what, in anyone’s eyes, the two of them now seemed to have a much more harmonious relationship. Except for that chain, which still stubbornly remained bound to Qi Guanrui’s wrist. And Qi Guanrui still hadn’t been allowed to make any moves on Gu Bai.
At noon that day, Qi Guanrui was grinding ink while Gu Bai reviewed documents. Outside the window came the sound of rustling. Then the window lattice shifted, and a small snake slithered inside.
Qi Guanrui waved his hand, and the snake wriggled its body, crawling up onto the desk.
Gu Bai lowered his gaze. The snake lifted its head. One person and one snake locked eyes.
Qi Guanrui smiled and dragged the snake’s tail back a bit, then said, “Gege, the reply I wanted has arrived.”
Gu Bai: “…Mm.”
Who knows what command Qi Guanrui had issued, but the snake flipped its body, revealing its belly.
At this moment, Gu Bai noticed there was a bulge under the snake’s belly—how the hell did this thing manage to trek across mountains and rivers to deliver a letter with such a big thing stuffed in its stomach?! This pervert Qi Guanrui was truly something else—“with a snake gu in hand, anything’s possible!”
Then, the bulge on the snake’s belly started to slide upward at an even pace. When it neared the snake’s head, the snake twisted again and opened its mouth—“plop.” A perfectly round little ball fell onto the desk.
Gu Bai lifted his eyes to look at Qi Guanrui.
Qi Guanrui smiled gently, “Yes, yes, I know, gege.” After speaking, he put on gloves, picked up a small knife, held the ball, and cut it open, pulling out a long piece of silk. The silk was densely packed with information:
From the city lord to the major families and even Princess Tianxiang, they had all determined that the recent terrorist attack was orchestrated by demons. In response, Princess Tianxiang decided to return early to report the situation to the emperor so that everyone, from the court to all levels below, could prepare for thorough investigations. The goal was to extend the investigation from Haoyang City to other Wu cities and even Wu towns to prevent the demons from exploiting any gaps. This was going to be a massive undertaking. The tracks of the giant python and the terror plot would now be under the court’s jurisdiction, and the captured demons would be escorted to the capital. Chou Tu’s demon identity had been exposed to Chen Yuanhao, but fortunately, with Chen Yuanhao’s cover, the city lord remained unaware. Haoyang City was finally no longer under lockdown—those inside the city could leave, and those outside could return.
After reading all this, Qi Guanrui furrowed his brow. “Princess Tianxiang has left?”
Gu Bai glanced at him. If Princess Tianxiang didn’t leave, what do you want to do, you damn pervert?
Qi Guanrui seemed to have suddenly become very attuned to Gu Bai’s emotions. He immediately leaned closer and said affectionately, “Princess Tianxiang offended me. I wanted to kill her… Gege, don’t be mad. I like gege the most.”
Gu Bai: “…” It took him a moment to realize—damn it, the pervert thought he was jealous!
Jealous my ass! I was relieved Princess Tianxiang escaped unharmed, okay! Do you think I didn’t notice your deep-seated malice toward her?! And by the way, in the original story, she was your main wife! Could you treat her a bit better?!
Qi Guanrui contentedly rubbed against Gu Bai for a while before saying, “Chen Yuanhao did well. I thought we’d lose Chou Tu this time, but he managed to manoeuvre even under the city lord’s watch…”
Gu Bai nodded. “He’s good.” [T/N: Fuck knows who he is. I forgot.]
As the top subordinate, he had to be outstanding. In the original story, even the crazy pervert’s subordinates managed to survive, so hiding a demon or two was nothing—of course, how Chen Yuanhao managed to keep Chou Tu from revealing his demonic form was something Gu Bai didn’t want to know! [T/N: Probably some gay stuff idk.]
Qi Guanrui’s eyes darkened. He didn’t like Ziche Shubai praising others—no matter who it was, he didn’t like it. But he also knew Chen Yuanhao was useful and still needed him… After taking a deep breath, Qi Guanrui suppressed the malice he felt toward Chen Yuanhao and spoke softly, “Gege, what do you plan to do next?”
Gu Bai thought for a moment. “Go back to school.” Are you kidding? I haven’t finished exploring the library tower yet; why wouldn’t I go back? [T/N: Nerd.]
Qi Guanrui tilted his head. “You’re going back now?”
Gu Bai immediately shook his head. “In a few days.”
While Haoyang City seemed fine for now, it would take some time to completely calm down. With the pervert constantly by his side, Gu Bai didn’t dare rush back. Better to wait until everything was resolved and then return to school. After all, he lived far away. It would make sense for him to receive information late ╮(╯▽╰)╭
Qi Guanrui smiled. “In that case… Gege, would you like to return to Qingyang Town with me for a visit?” he asked softly. “Gege saved me there, cared for me. I’m very grateful… I’d like to go back and take a look with gege. Is that okay?”
Gu Bai met the pervert’s gaze, filled with deep longing, and shuddered internally. So… Sappy. He never expected to pick up a pervert there; he had thought he’d picked up a little cutie! Little cuties turning into perverts—this was way too unfair!
Gu Bai: TAT No matter how much he tried to mentally prepare himself, he couldn’t shake the feeling that this was heading into “dating a pervert” territory! Can’t I just meet a normal person…
If he had known earlier that the little cutie was a pervert, or that this would lead to such an intimate subplot, or that he’d eventually… lose everything… as a freshly-transmigrated, ordinary-minded otaku, Gu Bai felt he might still have made the same mistakes. But there was no helping it now. Faced with the pervert’s gradually pitiful expression, Gu Bai nodded with a blank face. Fine, let’s go. He might as well see what that pervert had turned the place into.
And so, the two of them prepared to leave. The diligent steward Qin Xubo packed their luggage—despite Qi Guanrui offering to do it himself, he decided to stick close to Gu Bai instead. With the steward’s professional help, everything was quickly prepared. As the death guards drove the carriage carrying Gu Bai and Qi Guanrui off in a certain direction, they left behind a scene that sparked endless imagination among the citizens of Tiandu City.
The citizens watched the city lord leave, moved to tears.
Citizen A: Is the city lord going to visit his [bleep—]’s hometown? Truly a model man of the new era! Let’s give him a million likes!
Citizen B: Is this a homecoming wedding trip?
Citizen C: Take responsibility after everything’s said and done—finally, the city lord’s emotional intelligence has improved.
Citizen D: As long as the city lord’s happy… (sniffle)
Carrying the blessings of the citizens, Gu Bai shivered slightly.
Qi Guanrui quickly handed him a coat: “Gege, here, put this on.”
Gu Bai didn’t move.
Qi Guanrui draped the coat over him from behind, enveloping him snugly.
Gu Bai closed his eyes and clenched his fists. Why, why, why?! The hard thing poking against his lower back was about to make him explode. Does this pervert have to be in heat 24/7? Seriously? After suppressing his frustration, Gu Bai pretended not to notice.
At that moment, while he no longer feared the pervert, he still decided to let him have his way. For one reason only. Gu Bai schemed darkly: Let’s see if you can stay hard forever. I bet if you keep this up, you’ll burn out soon enough!
Qi Guanrui had no idea about Gu Bai’s sinister thoughts. While taking advantage of draping the coat, he was already envisioning countless vivid scenes in his head. In every single one, he’d turn Gu Bai this way and that, doing all kinds of things. Even though his hands were gently tying the coat’s belt, in his mind, the belt was already restraining Gu Bai’s wrists, leaving him bare.
With both harbouring secret thoughts, the two travelled together and soon reached the outskirts of Qingyang Town.
From the outside, Qingyang Town didn’t look much different from what Gu Bai remembered years ago. Qi Guanrui snapped his fingers, seeming to give some sort of signal. Soon, the carriage door opened, and Qi Guanrui stepped out first. He then extended his hand to help Gu Bai down.
Gu Bai had only taken a few steps forward toward the town when suddenly, the sound of rushing wind reached his ears, and with a “swish,” a line of people appeared at the town entrance!
Gu Bai was startled. These people made no noise—how did I not notice? That’s not logical! But then he froze.
That line of people was unnaturally pale. Their cultivation wasn’t quite at the Wu Jun level, but they were close. But not only were they thin, their skin looked wrinkled. Wrinkled skin was one thing, but their stiff, rod-like posture was another.
Gu Bai’s mind spun in chaos. Damn it! This is like a zombie siege!
Qi Guanrui raised an eyebrow and smiled slightly. “Gege, the heads of families, clan leaders, and experts from the martial town have come to welcome you.”
Gu Bai slowly turned his head. Welcome… me? You damn pervert, are you filming a horror movie?!
With a snap of Qi Guanrui’s fingers, the pale figures bowed in unison.
Gu Bai was even more flustered.
It was clear these people had all been parasitized by snake gu*. How many people had this guy turned into snake-controlled zombies?! The notion of a nostalgic, romantic outing together now completely evaporated.
*[T/N: Snake gu sounds way cooler, let’s keep it this way.]


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