Little Pink Starfish

On this day, Qi Guanrui removed one of Gu Bai’s anklets. Yes, you read that right, an anklet.

In order to control his older brother and prevent him from abandoning him, Qi Guanrui had put four fine chains made of forbidden iron around Gu Bai’s limbs. Those chains sealed Gu Bai’s meridians almost entirely and prevented his internal energy from circulating. With his dantian and Wu Qi sealed, he was essentially rendered powerless—the perfect state for kidnapping.

However, if one chain was removed, the dantian* would be unsealed and the internal energy would be free to circulate through the unchained limb. So, as the Python-Slaying Tournament was about to begin, with martial artists from all over the world gathering in Haoyang City, Qi Guanrui reluctantly decided to release one of the chains to ensure Gu Bai’s safety.

_{*[T/N: Dantian: Energy centre.]}

But why the anklet? Gu Bai’s family’s secret martial arts were obviously more powerful when it came to hand-based techniques. The answer: If he can’t fight, he can run.

Yes, Qi Guanrui’s thinking was quite profound, he couldn’t trust Gu Bai enough to unlock all the chains so he deliberated: If his arms were unchained, he could encounter someone with superior movement techniques, then Gu Bai may be forced to endure the fight. If he unchained the anklet, all Gu Bai needed to do was run in the direction of Qi Guanrui, and he’d be safe.

However, a problem remains: What if Gu Bai runs in the wrong direction?

Qi Guanrui: Heh, if my brother wants to run from me, he’ll have to get through all the other martial artists instead.

Gu Bai didn’t consider Qi Guanrui’s thoughts, he only cared that he could finally feel his meridians opening up. Yay! His dantian was no longer stiff and tight; it felt heavy but secure. He rotated his ankle and felt he could leap a great distance with just a bit of internal energy. Then Qi Guanrui took out a black object and wiggled it in front of Gu Bai.

…What is that? (⊙_⊙) When Gu Bai saw it clearly, he was stunned. It was a Serpent Curse.

Qi Guanrui coaxed, “I can never feel at ease with you, gege. Please take this little creature with you and let it protect you.”

…It sounded as though Qi Guanrui wouldn’t be accompanying him in the tournament. Was that really the case? If so, that would be great, right? ╮(╯▽╰)╭ But Qi Guanrui would never think that way, he just wanted double the insurance.

Gu Bai: “Where should I keep it?” If you dare say I should keep it in my head…

Qi Guanrui smiled, “It’s just a beast; it’s not worthy of touching you. I know you dislike anything clingy, but if you agree, it will just slither by your feet.”

Gu Bai nodded. Even though he would still be watched, Gu Bai was accepting since Qi Guanrui wasn’t trying to control him puppet-style. Qi Guanrui’s smile warmed.

The pair of them, along with Chen Yuanhao and Qiu Tu, who were already waiting outside, headed towards the academy gates. They, too, had earned their spots for the tournament.

Gu Bai: …You’ve done so well.

Along the way, they encountered many people. Those who wore smiles were mostly those who had earned their spots in the tournament. There were some martial artists in the academy, each with a significant presence, but their fighting abilities were somewhat lacking as the strongest was of Wu Wang level. Though if one were to reach the Wu Di level, they wouldn’t waste their time staying in an academy. At that level, they would no longer need the academy’s support; they could easily train on their own.

The destination was a large hall in the centre of the city that was newly constructed. It was said to have been made purely to accommodate the mass of martial artists that were gathering for the tournament. It looked luxurious and scrupulously designed; Haoyang City had certainly invested a lot of resources.

Gu Bai raised his head, looking at the huge stone tablet in front of the venue, with the words “Python-Slaying Tournament” boldly inscribed on it in beautiful characters.

In any Xianxia or Wuxia-style novels, whenever there’s a major villain, there’s always some kind of tournament. For example, lion slaughtering, turtle killing*, demon extermination, bullfighting**, (Hold on…) simple and straightforward, with a clear purpose in mind. The events would typically be organised like so: The heroes gather together, elect a leader, and then fight the bad guys. The endings usually fall into two types:

1. The leader turns out to be the actual villain, and the main character either retires or gains the greatest benefit from the situation;
2. The leader is good but short-lived, the villain is bad, and everyone else becomes a stepping stone for the main character.

^{*[T/N: What the fuck did that turtle do to deserve an execution? Also, how could killing a turtle turn into a tournament? It’s a fucking turtle it’s probably where you left it guys, just go look.] **[T/N: Gay stuff.]}

In Gu Bai’s novel, it’s a bit different, but ultimately, the main character gets all the benefits. Regardless, the tournament was about to begin; before everything else, they needed to get through the chaotic initial phase.

Outside the venue, several beautiful young women led the way, guiding the four of them into the hall. The venue was vast; beside a tall stage, there were many round and long tables scattered about, with numerous stools placed around them. Similar to a large communal feast, with a “buffet-style” seating arrangement—cost-effective and efficient, everyone was satisfied.

Gu Bai, Chen Yuanhao, and Qiu Tu were all students of Qingtian Academy, while Qi Guanrui, under Chen Yuanhao’s suggestion, appeared as a “late-coming new student,” thus entering as a student as well. However, being students meant that they were all martial artists at the Wu Jun level, which meant they could only sit in the low-ranked seats.

Qi Guanrui: Perfect. I can take advantage of the situation.

Gu Bai: Keep a low profile and watch the show without getting involved.

Gradually, the banquet tables were filled with large fish and various meats. Because vegetarian dishes wouldn’t fill the stomachs of martial artists, presenting them would be embarrassing. Some early-arriving martial artists were already eating meat and drinking wine without reservation, while casually discussing topics loudly. Gu Bai frowned slightly.

Qi Guanrui leaned closer and asked, “Gege, is it too noisy for you?”

Gu Bai shook his head.

Qi Guanrui nodded in understanding, “Then it must be because it’s too dirty.” He looked around the low-ranked tables. There weren’t many martial artists from prominent families at this level, most of them were people who made a living on their own. They were ignorant to dining etiquette and general hygiene; When they ate, their food would often fly everywhere, inadvertently contaminating the shared dishes. The more Gu Bai looked, the more his stomach churned. He wasn’t a germophobe, he was just accustomed to cleanliness. He silently turned his face away and decided not to touch the food.

Qi Guanrui, of course, had no intention to give Gu Bai food covered in someone else’s saliva, so he didn’t hesitate. He exchanged a glance with Chen Yuanhao.

Chen Yuanhao: Why is it always me? With some time left before the tournament started, he sighed and quickly left the hall, returning shortly with a pocket dimension item which he handed to his Lord. 

Qi Guanrui smiled cheerfully at Gu Bai. “I have some dishes from the city that are clean. If you like, Xiaoshan will get them for you. How about it, gege?”

Gu Bai turned his head. You’ve already got your name on the family tree*, yet you’re calling yourself “Xiaoshan” and trying to act cute. Aren’t you embarrassed?

_{*[T/N: Probably means they’re basically married because QGR knocked and locked him up… That’s how marriage works, right?]}

Qi Guanrui was clearly not embarrassed. Although he couldn’t feed Gu Bai directly in public, he could still make an intimate gesture, so when Gu Bai took the delicate pastry from Qi Guanrui’s hands, the latter smiled warmly, his eyes filled with affection.

Gu Bai’s eyelid twitched. At this rate, my deadpan expression will be cured. Meanwhile, my bottom line keeps falling every day!

As time passed, more and more people arrived, filling the all the seats apart from ones closest to the stage. Suddenly, a man who seemed to be the host jumped up onto the stage! Gu Bai couldn’t shake the feeling that this would end up being like the principal’s speech when they returned to school. However this feeling was swiftly pushed aside, as the host wasn’t even there to speak; he was there to announce the guests.

The host’s introductions stuck to a basic template:

“Next, please welcome X sect’s X sect leader, accompanied by their disciples!”

“Now, walking toward us is the renowned X wandering hero, whose body is powerful and whose strength is extraordinary!”

“There was once a legendary X Wu Di who shook the nine provinces with his sword. Today, fate has brought him here, and we must honour him!”

And so on, officially introducing the renowned martial artists and heroes attending the tournament. In general, everyone was here for their own self-interests, but any major figure was still to be treated with respect and so giving them a special introduction was a sign of that respect.

As Wu Wang or even Wu Di warriors appeared, their mere presence exuded such a pressure that the little shrimpy Wu Jun participants could not help but be intimidated. At that point, even eating and drinking became inappropriate. In the non-fictional realm, if a student disrespected guests at a school assembly, at most the teachers would make them write an apology. But here, if you offend a powerful martial artist… You could be slapped dead, and no one would even bat an eye.

Gu Bai kept a low profile, looking at the last pastry in his hand. He popped it into his mouth, pretending that nothing was happening. Then, he glanced at Qi Guanrui—Oh fuck! The pervert’s eyes are like lasers!* Gu Bai followed the direction of Qi Guanrui’s beams of light and saw a group of Wu Wangs. Holy shit! Is he hungry or something? Although Qi Guanrui appeared perfectly normal, in Gu Bai’s eyes, he looked like a giant drooling snake.

Qi Guanrui turned his head and smiled softly as if he had noticed Gu Bai’s gaze.

The damn pervert’s eyes are still gleaming!* This is the Python-Slaying Tournament! These people came to discuss the best way to slaughter you! Do you understand that?! Please be serious and sober about this!

_{*[T/N: ( ✧_✧)]}

Perhaps Qi Guanrui could sense Gu Bai’s ridicule; he blinked, and the ambition was gone from his eyes. Trapping Ziche Shubai had satisfied Qi Guanrui’s primal desires, so he had no urge to hunt. However, this Python-Slaying Tournament was his chance… After all, they were here to kill him, so if they were killed instead, it wouldn’t be unexpected, right? Once he had devoured that group of Wu Wangs, he could advance further, and then… He would be capable of even more.

At that time, the host on the stage showed a mysterious smile. He spoke loudly, “For this Python-Slaying Tournament, there is one more esteemed guest arriving.”

As soon as the host finished speaking, a distant, melodious Buddhist chant echoed from the horizon.